I am getting off. Love you all. I mean that. I have a highly sophisticated understanding of love. I promise i am loving you all from all the way over here...and if you concentrate, you can feel it.

But, you will feel it deeper, harder, stronger if you come closer...


and then closer...


I love distraction in the form of an erection.

Coming for me some more? Email is best, but feel free to call/text if you prefer.

My contact info is always published on my site for your convenience. No need to store it.

First time booking me?
Visit my site for all the details. Submit the mutually convenient booking form.
Thank you!


I fucking love planners!

I love fucking planners!

I fucking love fucking planners!

Thank you, so much, planner! It is a double gift. I get to look forward with anticipation plus you enable me to ignore anyone who's approach does not create the desire to shower them in gratitude.

πŸ’¦ πŸ’¦ πŸ’¦

I have always been selective.

The current political climate changes nothing about my process.

This ship has always been air tight.

We allow for frequent venting of
πŸ’¦ excess fluids πŸ’¦
to maintain a constant
pressure balance between
anticipation 😍 and
total satisfaction 😊
at all times.

I book one suitor a day. Plan ahead, and be the one.

Expanding horizons and once-in-a-lifetime adventures are my specialty - with or without a resort destination.


Universally compatible!

Any creed, color, ethnicity, culture, religion, profession, shape, size, gender, age of legal consent, for sure -

- but you can also be shameless, kinky, shy, awkward, confident, talkative, quiet, married, single, political, hippy, educated, street smart, dirty talker, smut lover, exhibitionist, voyeur -

- provided you also have integrity.

The only flavor I don't indulge is asshat which is the flavor you get when you remove integrity.


I am only under all the following conditions:

You know how to read in context and anticipate that "now" means i am in town right now
(as opposed to advertising an upcoming visit) and "available" means potentially available to book during my visit with a stellar suitor but no kind of available for asshattery.

You immediately comply with the booking process, establishing you are a real man who knows how to get what he wants and effectively turning me on.

All data required to book plus everything i want to share with a stranger is on my extensive, exclusive, hilarious & highly informative site.


(Seriously, it is verbose to the point of redundancy.)

I cannot manage your:

scroll lock
serious commitment issues
arrested development
teasing - no follow through

I can manage your:


Right after you:


*Acronyms, puns & entendres intended.

is not literal.

Defined in context:
"I am available in a reasonable amount of time, for a suitor enthusiastically respecting my process."

The context: I am a
kinkysexual over-achiever...
not a pizza.

Anyone can accomplish the ridiculously simple goal of orgasm.

As a fully dedicated hedonist with a high bar, my goal is nothing short of nirvana for us both.

Once-in-a-lifetime - each time.

Enable me to rock your world by planning ahead.


Isolation blues?
This prescribes an extended tryst!

Your (naked, lingerie, or only) plus a healing salts soak and rub down on top of our usual debauchery is certain to renew your resolve.

Food 2nd. Not tryin to kill an erection with a full belly.


I have Rona Specials available since March 2020 but the only way to find out about them is to book a tryst. The offers will be in my confirmation mail. I also accept 6 different methods of deposit/pre-pay but those are not published either and will also be in the confirmation mail. I circumstantially require a deposit* for some requests but i offer a discount for a deposit even when not required - in the confirmation mail.


*Details in the Terms of Engagement and FAQ.

psst, 150 disappearing, reappearing reviews,
plus a few new ones!


My stellar reviews display my aptitude for gratitude but are almost exclusively written about first trysts by those predisposed to writing reviews. I never mention reviews while with a suitor.

My long time lovers have a far deeper feel for my full sagacity.

In other words, this is just the beginning!

Welcome to the deep end.
Prepare to get wet.

πŸ’¦ πŸ’¦ πŸ’¦ πŸ’¦ πŸ’¦ πŸ’¦ πŸ’¦

Come discover all the various ways (and exactly how) to find yourself ensconced for a time in the ambitiously hedonistic energy of the Infamous Danielle Squirts!


2021 Pix, availability, location, tour dates, special events, rates, contact info, booking details - all on the schedule page:



Hilarious/highly informative FAQ:

Exclusive duo partners:

Show older

Switter, a sex work-friendly social space. Check out Tryst.link, our verified escort directory. Looking for listings? Visit Switter Listings Looking for Backpage alternatives?